I suck again!

apparently I suck. I did not get the summer fellowship AGAIN! This year I am a senior student entering my fifth year in the fall. I have taught for the last 3 summers and last 6 semesters in a row. I could really use summer for RESEARCH! The reason I'm supposedly in school. I don't get it. I know my PI wrote me a good letter. She modeled it after another faculty's letter from last year, whose student did get it. I know she even mentioned my first author pub that is coming out, and the manuscript we are working on....

If I can't even get money for the summer (that you don't even submit a CV too!) how can I compete at anything.

ack