Regular Tuesday
So today it rained a ton, very hard. But oddly when I came out this afternoon it was warm and sweltery. Not at all what I expected for October rain, where it would usually be cool.
Sunday my sister, brother-in-law and two nephews and parents came over for dinner. My sister and her husband were in town to visit a whole slew of their friends so E and I had gone out to drinks with them all Friday and Saturday. My parents were watching the kids so we all met at my place Sunday. My mom brought some awesome roast beef for French dips and I made cheddar mashed potatoes and salad. I don't have a table so we all sort of crowded around my coffee table on the couches. It was great to see my nephews and all just hang out for a bit.
I love my mom but sometimes she gives me mixed messages. She is an outstanding mother, but she gave up on going to school and her career for years to have children. She did eventually go back (which I think was amazingly difficult, w/ 5 kids!) and she works now. However, sometimes she says, if I hadn't met your father and had kids I would have probably pursued a PhD. But, she also says she doesn't understand these young people that she works with, they are missing out, as staying home w/ us was the best thing she ever did. And when she is around my sister w/ the two kid she says things like, oh it almost makes you want to start over to have even more kids. (Of course they are getting close to retirement so that won't really happen) It just leaves me feeling like on one hand she things this whole degree thing is a waste, as I should be starting my family. And if I try to both, pursue this academic thing and have a family, I'd be wasting my best time at work. I don't even have kids yet! But it stresses me out now because I am so into my work. I want to do well and find a job I like, and have a family. bleh.
Today I talked with some of my grad school friends and I am very thankful I have E. One of my friends husbands is a nice guy but unmotivated. He has been unhappy w/ his job for a long, long time but refuses to look for other employment, or change the things he needs to in order to get promoted. I am just thankful I have someone who is supportive of me but also motivated to do well for himself.
Sunday my sister, brother-in-law and two nephews and parents came over for dinner. My sister and her husband were in town to visit a whole slew of their friends so E and I had gone out to drinks with them all Friday and Saturday. My parents were watching the kids so we all met at my place Sunday. My mom brought some awesome roast beef for French dips and I made cheddar mashed potatoes and salad. I don't have a table so we all sort of crowded around my coffee table on the couches. It was great to see my nephews and all just hang out for a bit.
I love my mom but sometimes she gives me mixed messages. She is an outstanding mother, but she gave up on going to school and her career for years to have children. She did eventually go back (which I think was amazingly difficult, w/ 5 kids!) and she works now. However, sometimes she says, if I hadn't met your father and had kids I would have probably pursued a PhD. But, she also says she doesn't understand these young people that she works with, they are missing out, as staying home w/ us was the best thing she ever did. And when she is around my sister w/ the two kid she says things like, oh it almost makes you want to start over to have even more kids. (Of course they are getting close to retirement so that won't really happen) It just leaves me feeling like on one hand she things this whole degree thing is a waste, as I should be starting my family. And if I try to both, pursue this academic thing and have a family, I'd be wasting my best time at work. I don't even have kids yet! But it stresses me out now because I am so into my work. I want to do well and find a job I like, and have a family. bleh.
Today I talked with some of my grad school friends and I am very thankful I have E. One of my friends husbands is a nice guy but unmotivated. He has been unhappy w/ his job for a long, long time but refuses to look for other employment, or change the things he needs to in order to get promoted. I am just thankful I have someone who is supportive of me but also motivated to do well for himself.
posted by B @ Tuesday, October 02, 2007
1 Comments:
At 5:24 PM,
Anonymous said…
I sometimes feel like that, too, B. My mom emphasizes how important it is to get a good, fancy, powerful job, and then talks about how I should remember that family is most important and why would I ever let work come before them, or friends? And I feel like: if I'm going to have this good job, sometimes it's going to have to come first.
Sometime, we should chat.
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